Thanks for voting here and via email for your favorite “Query I’d love to send but never would” entry. It was a close contest, but Terri Conroy’s Cosmo query garnered the most votes. Terri gets a signed copy of The Renegade Writer’s Query Letters That Rock when it’s released in November. The winning query is below. [LF]

Dear Cosmo Editor,

You wanted to drive him crazy, but you ended up driving him to the emergency room. When happens when those secrets to spice up your sex life end in disaster?

That’s the question I’d like to answer in an article called: When he’s literally begging for mercy. The article looks at that staple of women’s magazines – the sex tips – and shows how bad instructions and poor execution have led to humiliation, pain and even injury for many unfortunate couples.

In the article, I’ll focus on the first-hand experiences of many couples who have told their story, including:

David, a 45 year old professor whose wife Shelley is obsessed with trying out the latest sex tips. “When the mail comes in and I see one of those titles on her magazine, I’m tempted to throw it out,” he says. “Shelley’s a wonderful wife and mother, but she’s horrible at following directions. I’m on edge all week just waiting for the night she wants to practice.”

Kathy, a 26 year old nurse who tested a technique that terrified her boyfriend “I thought I was following the instructions but when he let out a blood-curdling scream, it just didn’t sound like he was enjoying it. Maybe the articles should have diagrams.”

Sean, a 32 year old attorney whose two-year wedding anniversary celebration ended with an emergency room visit and a blood transfusion. “I think I blacked out,” he says recounting the night of the incident, “but not in a good way. The scar’s almost gone, though, so that’s a positive.”

In addition to these first-person accounts, I’ll include advice from sex therapists on how to tell the difference between a moan of pleasure and one of pain. Finally, I’ll conclude with a physician’s recommendations on how to handle any sex-related injury.

I’m a freelance writer based in Atlanta and I’ve written for…

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